Robot the Elf
Updated: May 17, 2020
It’s Thanksgiving … and I should have been most concerned about the menu or if I had all items necessary to create a magical Thanksgiving. But no, you know the first thought that popped into my head when I woke up this morning?
WHERE IS THAT DAMN ELF?
I know many families have an elf that arrives very soon after Thanksgiving. But, mine? Well, Robot the Elf is nowhere to be found and I'm starting to worry if she'll even make an appearance this year. She's hidden somewhere "safe", even safe from me!
Flashback to Christmas Eve last year, late late at night after all of Christmas morning had been set…I said goodbye to Robot the Elf. But, it was in a very panicked rush, after midnight and a few too many glasses of holiday cheer. Robot’s trip back to the North Pole was by way of the back of my closet, or possibly stuffed behind many items at the top of my refrigerator. Who can remember at this point? I admit, this was both risky and reckless. I mean, do you know how easy it would be for one of the kids to find her? This scenario has played out for the last few years and she always eventually shows up.
Once found, she doesn’t even say hello. She just looks at me with these glaring, beady, judgy eyes. I feel her crazy eyes on me all Christmas season, every night, staring as I sit on the couch enjoying a glass of wine instead of thinking of some creative place to move her to. I can imagine what she’s thinking (if she had a brain that is).
How did I get stuck with a mom with such low elf staging standards? At the very least, she could move me each night! I’d like to cause some fun mischief in this house, like say covering the kitchen in flour or hanging out in that dirty bathroom!
Robot usually sits perched on top of my fireplace staring down at me. Honestly, she reminds me of that older woman at the grocery store who gave me ALL the looks and comments when she noticed my son didn’t have his jacket on.
Each year I look back at our elf, judging her for the burden she has become. The burden that I let into this house. Now, don’t get me wrong. I love the holidays. I love crafting and baking with the kids, I love going to festive events. But, whoever you are, creator of elf on the shelf, I did not need an elf. And yes, it's my own fault that I bought into this whole thing in the first place. But, it’s starting to feel as if I’m in a very one-sided relationship. The benefits of which wear off after the first few threats of a report back to Santa himself.
Here’s the thing. I want to know, who is this elf really here to watch? Is it me? Because whenever I look in the direction of that elf and see it’s beady eyes staring at me, I feel as though this elf is here to make sure my kids are experiencing this holiday season to the fullest. The pressure is real! It seems there is no amount of holiday-ing that is too much. If I don’t get pictures of my children sitting on Santa’s lap, decorating Christmas cookies, going to some sort of zoolights or other lights display, and all the other things that come up- well? According to those awful social media standards, I could be failing!
But, I don’t have to feel that way and neither do you. This year, I’m going to put less pressure on myself to do ALL THE THINGS and focus more on doing meaningful activities. Don't get me wrong, we will still be doing all the activities we enjoy as a family. I'm just going to focus on not feeling guilty when we can't seem to fit it everything in. In an effort to turn down my holiday stress, I’m going to try and limit the pressure I feel to keep up with everyone. This year, I found myself begging for time to slow before December hits and I am thrown into the hectic and busy days that lead up to Christmas.
Hats off to all those moms who pull of some amazing stunts with their elves. But, it’s just not for me. I’m not judging, rather I’m impressed by your dedication to take the time each night to pull it all off. As for me? I’ll be over here, forgetting each night about that elf and waking up in a panicked sweat rushing down the stairs to move it every morning.
Cheers to the start of another crazy holiday season!